did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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