she was so not down for the gang bang
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
