No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
