i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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