we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Randomize