I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
