and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
