Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
