I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
