It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
