it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Too much gin, very little bucket
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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