Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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