how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
