he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
did i just pee glitter
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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