if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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