after a month anything with tits is on the radar
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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