Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
