we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Randomize
