you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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