Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
