did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
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So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
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Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures