O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
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