this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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