Buhtt sex?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
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Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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