I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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