Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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