I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize