BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
