In the future we'll all be gay
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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