Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He better not be in your backpack
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
