she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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