You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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