no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
You dont lie about slip and slides
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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