Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
