dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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