YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
