The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
