I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize