We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
