I want to make a zoo with you.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Randomize
