i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
me + whiskey = a bad person
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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