As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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