His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
