Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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