just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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