Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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