You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
