You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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