I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
