you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
