dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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